Like a horse and carriage, stress and pregnancy tend to go together. If you're one of those who can just let it all slide like water off a duck's back, good for you.
Most of us, though, can't escape those nagging thoughts. Will the baby be healthy? Am I eating well enough? Sleeping enough? Exercising? And, of course, if it's your first, there's always that eternal one: will I be able to be a good mother?
I don't buy the story that stress is an unmitigated evil. That, it seems to me, is the talk of shallow sandal wearing, granola eaters. Stress contributes much to our ability to create, achieve and meet responsibilities.
Excessive and chronic stress, though, is a whole different kettle of fish. The one truly completely unproductive kind of stress is stress about stress. And, since excessive, chronic stress in pregnancy can lead to problems for the baby, stressing about stress in pregnancy is as understandable and common as it is ill-advised.
Feeling stressed about whether we're too stressed is pointless and harmful. So, it is necessary to avoid descending a downward spiral created by yourself.
Whenever an awareness of stressing over stress comes apparent to you, preventative action is prescribed. When you find yourself in that situation, there are two strategies I'd suggest you try: communicating and taking inventory.
If you're having concerns about the pregnancy, share them with your partner. I know that some pregnant women's stress is precisely over their partner: how is he handling it? Will he be able to cope?
Whether that's the case or not, don't be surprised if he isn't also having doubts and feeling stressed - possibly over how you're coping! Sharing your feelings, even stating the fear you feel you shouldn't be having, is an amazing elixir.
There's considerable reassurance in going through these doubts together, knowing and feeling that you're not alone. And, it is always striking how doubts and fears can simply vanish once we refuse to allow them to fester.
And, of course, don't forget your friends. Don't assume that they can only be comforts to you if they're experienced mothers. Of course there can be a great benefit in talking to those who have been through it all. Even if not, though, sometimes just reminding yourself about your wonderful support network can be immensely comforting.
The second strategy I'd ask you to consider is inventory taking. It's understandable to wonder about how your eating or exercising practices might affect your baby. Don't stress about it, though. If you have questions, answer them!
My dear, you are after all living in the most remarkable age of knowledge access in the history of the world. You know, that little old Internet thing? Use it! A wealth of health information, from the most credible scientific medical and maternal care professionals, is available at your finger tips. So, if you start feeling yourself begin to stress out, about your dietary or other decisions, stop fretting and start researching. When you have doubts about what to do; find out what to do.
If you're not doing it, then do it. And if it turns out, as it probably will, that you're doing everything just find, then hopefully your mind will be put at ease.
Finally, if neither of these strategies work for you, perhaps you're just overly prone to worry. Some of us are like that. Then, try engaging in activities known for inducing relaxed states. Yoga, deep-breathing, meditation, massage, warm baths are old standbys.
And, give yourself time to relax. Many women are just too accustomed to being on top of everything for everyone. If that's your nature, so be it. But while you're pregnant, you need to let go a little bit. Put your feet up and let others bear some of the responsibility for a while. If you work outside of the home, don't be ashamed of taking off some sick days. Even if you're not technically sick. I mean, really, aren't you already doing the most important job of your life: bringing a happy, healthy child into the world?
Generally, stress becomes a serious problem only if we allow it. Nip it in the bud when you see it coming. Refuse to allow yourself to dwell on negative thoughts. Nothing good comes from pointless or directionless worry. A far better use of that great imagination of yours is the excited anticipation of that beautiful baby of yours, on its way. Here's hoping the suggestions above assist you in letting go of your stress and pregnancy concerns, and having a wonderful pregnancy.
Most of us, though, can't escape those nagging thoughts. Will the baby be healthy? Am I eating well enough? Sleeping enough? Exercising? And, of course, if it's your first, there's always that eternal one: will I be able to be a good mother?
I don't buy the story that stress is an unmitigated evil. That, it seems to me, is the talk of shallow sandal wearing, granola eaters. Stress contributes much to our ability to create, achieve and meet responsibilities.
Excessive and chronic stress, though, is a whole different kettle of fish. The one truly completely unproductive kind of stress is stress about stress. And, since excessive, chronic stress in pregnancy can lead to problems for the baby, stressing about stress in pregnancy is as understandable and common as it is ill-advised.
Feeling stressed about whether we're too stressed is pointless and harmful. So, it is necessary to avoid descending a downward spiral created by yourself.
Whenever an awareness of stressing over stress comes apparent to you, preventative action is prescribed. When you find yourself in that situation, there are two strategies I'd suggest you try: communicating and taking inventory.
If you're having concerns about the pregnancy, share them with your partner. I know that some pregnant women's stress is precisely over their partner: how is he handling it? Will he be able to cope?
Whether that's the case or not, don't be surprised if he isn't also having doubts and feeling stressed - possibly over how you're coping! Sharing your feelings, even stating the fear you feel you shouldn't be having, is an amazing elixir.
There's considerable reassurance in going through these doubts together, knowing and feeling that you're not alone. And, it is always striking how doubts and fears can simply vanish once we refuse to allow them to fester.
And, of course, don't forget your friends. Don't assume that they can only be comforts to you if they're experienced mothers. Of course there can be a great benefit in talking to those who have been through it all. Even if not, though, sometimes just reminding yourself about your wonderful support network can be immensely comforting.
The second strategy I'd ask you to consider is inventory taking. It's understandable to wonder about how your eating or exercising practices might affect your baby. Don't stress about it, though. If you have questions, answer them!
My dear, you are after all living in the most remarkable age of knowledge access in the history of the world. You know, that little old Internet thing? Use it! A wealth of health information, from the most credible scientific medical and maternal care professionals, is available at your finger tips. So, if you start feeling yourself begin to stress out, about your dietary or other decisions, stop fretting and start researching. When you have doubts about what to do; find out what to do.
If you're not doing it, then do it. And if it turns out, as it probably will, that you're doing everything just find, then hopefully your mind will be put at ease.
Finally, if neither of these strategies work for you, perhaps you're just overly prone to worry. Some of us are like that. Then, try engaging in activities known for inducing relaxed states. Yoga, deep-breathing, meditation, massage, warm baths are old standbys.
And, give yourself time to relax. Many women are just too accustomed to being on top of everything for everyone. If that's your nature, so be it. But while you're pregnant, you need to let go a little bit. Put your feet up and let others bear some of the responsibility for a while. If you work outside of the home, don't be ashamed of taking off some sick days. Even if you're not technically sick. I mean, really, aren't you already doing the most important job of your life: bringing a happy, healthy child into the world?
Generally, stress becomes a serious problem only if we allow it. Nip it in the bud when you see it coming. Refuse to allow yourself to dwell on negative thoughts. Nothing good comes from pointless or directionless worry. A far better use of that great imagination of yours is the excited anticipation of that beautiful baby of yours, on its way. Here's hoping the suggestions above assist you in letting go of your stress and pregnancy concerns, and having a wonderful pregnancy.
About the Author:
Whether it's you or someone you love is coping with an unusually stressful pregnancy, you need to follow all the news and tips available on the Stress and Pregnancy blog. Also, check out this concise, articulate video about stress and pregnancy to be better informed. Knowledge is strength!
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